Do you sometimes think it would be nice to go to the beach, raise your arms up to the sky and look up to the clouds, and suddenly be unknown?
I like being alone, and un-known, or at least not well-known, by anyone. I am not sure why. I suppose because there is a sort of freedom in it. It is not often we get the opportunity to be so; most always, there are people who know what you are up to and where you are, and who will wonder if you disappear for a weekend. But, on the other hand, I miss being known, and love having people who are friends, with whom talk is big and small. I love to have conversations that are uninteresting, and it is okay. No, edit that – I love to have people who make the content of conversations irrelevant, simply because you enjoy being around them. Is that one definition of friendship? Companionship, perhaps? The state when talk and the time is enjoyable because of the people, not necessarily the content? If we are doing definitions, there should be something included about how the good friends, the good companions, know something is up before you have to tell them, something about how those people can read you, and you do not have to bother with trying to put words on something that is very difficult to explain. Some issues, ideas, are fussy and do not like to wear word-clothes. They are very difficult to clothe, those. Silly, naked little ghost ideas. It is not worth the energy it takes to chase them down and peg something on them which they do not want to wear. Better to have those who look at you, and see it, and their raised eyebrows say, “Those little naked ghost ideas bothering you again, is it?”
You can only be unknown for so long, and sometimes it is nice to savor the taste of it. Makes me think of being an astronaut, sitting in a capsule floating around the earth, looking down, apart. (That’s Tom Delonge’s, of Blink-182 and Angels & Airwaves, his idea.) Or, what if you were not yourself, but rather your reflection? You would be able to live in interesting places, like mirrors, and water, and windows. You wouldn’t really be part of this world, busy like your counterpart.
Of course, all the while, beneath the idea of being unknown, to know you are known by only One. Together, to steal away…